5 Finger Discount!

Walkin' down the aisles at the big box corporate store
See all these shiny things that I just can't afford
I take a look around, make sure I'm being ignored
I put what I want right in my pocket and I walk on out the door

I never rob no mom and pop
what do you take me for?
Stealing from both friend or foe goes against my morals
But when it comes to these companies they don't deserve my dime
My conscious is clear, it's all on clearance for free 99

I'm shopliftin'
Shopliftin'
Take if off the shelf
Treat yourself
Why not shop lift it?

These corporate stores they hoard resources and run on greed
While the poor can't afford to meet their basic needs
They exploit their labor force, comercialize and commodify
They line their pockets with massive profits
So I line mine with merchandise

Steal from the rich
Give to the poor
They've got their tax loopholes
Wealth hidden offshore
If we can't have wholesale change
We'll have to nickel and dime
Scannin' bananas for every item at the self checkout line

Shopliftin'
Shopliftin'
Fight the man any way you can
Why not shoplift it?

I pilfered plenty of packs of pens
Pinched some vitamins and supplements
Grabbed a bag of jerky and a bottle of booze
Boosted some juice and kombucha too
Snatched a fashionable shirt I'd seen
Nicked a new novel I been meaning to read
Took my time didn't call attention
Didn't pay no mind to the loss prevention
Nabbed some nailpolish cuz it only cost a buck
Absconded with some condoms cuz they cost far too much
Robbed them of salami
When I went down to the Deli
Took all their free samples
Till I filled up my big belly
I stole a look at one last treat before I decided to leave
Shoplifted some chocolate cuz all chocolate should be free

Shoplifting
Shoplifitng
Take the power back, kleptomaniacs
Why not shoplift it?